Sunday, January 18, 2015

0 Six Secrets Of Body Language In Flirting With Women

Six Secrets Of Body Language In Flirting With Women
"Having the proper body language in flirting with women is an absolute must. Before you can get a woman's number or possibly go home with her, you have to build attraction and rapport. By developing the "RIGHT KIND" of body language you'll be able to increase your overall success with women?

So how do you develop a body language that will draw-in a woman?

Well it can be accomplished in six easy steps that are fairly easy to master:

1. Develop a positive attitude and ambiance. Your overall demeanor is the most important step to developing the proper body language in flirting. This means having fun in your conversation and genuinely enjoying her company. If you take the time to make sure you're having fun, this attitude will be obvious in your interaction.

2. Carry yourself in a confident manner. A strong and confident personality will always attract women. So when you approach women and engage them in a conversation, take the time to ensure that you come across as confident. Even if you don't feel particularly confident, keep practicing till you can at least fake it.

3. Maximize the power of your facial expressions. Your facial expressions in conversations have a direct impact on how quickly you can develop rapport with a woman. So make sure you're sending the right kind of messages. This can be done by maintaining a confident smile and maintaining eye contact with her.

4. Lightly touch her during your interactions. A simple way to quickly build attraction is to lightly touch women during your conversations. By breaking the "TOUCHING BARRIER", you're subconsciously demonstrating that you have some attraction to her. But if she pulls away or looks upset, don't touch her again. This pretty much means she doesn't want you to touch her right now. (LATER ON, THIS COULD CHANGE)

5.Direct your body and attention to her. When you're talking to woman, make sure that you're facing her. While this may seem like common sense, a lot guys make the mistake of not paying full attention to women. So when you're talking to her, make sure that your body appears both open and directly turned towards her.

6. Keep your concentration on what she is saying. Another huge mistake that guys make is letting their mind wander or thinking about how to "GET INTO A WOMAN'S PANTS". When you're talking to a woman, make sure you're listening to what she is saying. If you let your concentration slip, she'll probably pick up on the fact that you're not listening and will get annoyed. Concentrate on what she is saying and let her know that she is the most important person in the room.

By following the six "BODY LANGUAGE IN FLIRTING" steps I described above, you'll find that your conversations with women are much more successful. In addition you'll discover that you can get more numbers and have more fun on dates.

Recommended books (free to download):Thundercat - The Ultimate Secret To Getting Good With Women

Dr Gabriel - Master Of Body Language In Negotiation

Robert Henderson - Secrets Of Dating Asian Women

Labels: julian pickup myth speed seduction pick artist pickup women valentine applied magic things need develop changing reloaded cocky women steps your roosh body langauge


Thursday, January 15, 2015

1 Welcome To The Harlequin Romance Spotlight From The Harlequin Romance Editors

Welcome To The Harlequin Romance Spotlight From The Harlequin Romance Editors
Welcome to the Harlequin Romance spotlight - from the Harlequin Romance Editors!

We're the Harlequin Romance editors, Bryony, Meg, Anna and Charlotte, and we're so glad you've stopped by at this special spotlight on Harlequin Romance. We'd like to tell you all about the series we acquire for, and also to let you know about our 'fast track' event for aspiring authors which is currently taking place.

Without further ado, let's get to grips with what the Harlequin Romance team is looking for! We acquire for both Harlequin Romance and some of the books from Harlequin Presents Extra. Let's kick off with a look at the world of "HARLEQUIN ROMANCE".

We offer readers a romantic, uplifting, contemporary story that captures the thrill and rush of falling in love. However, the tone of the series varies quite a lot from traditional and emotional with well-loved romantic themes, to fun and flirty lighter reads.

For the SOFTER, MORE EMOTIONAL, ROMANTIC END OF THE SERIES, the heroine is really the key. Readers need to be able to relate to her, laugh with her, cry with her and imagine she could be their friend. Remember, it's through the heroine's eyes that we fall in love with the hero!

Our heroes are alpha but attainable - they're not all super rich international tycoons (although some might be!). They're successful in their own right and should be a strong man our heroine would aspire to be with, the kind of man you would hope to meet in real life.

What about sensuality level? Well, these stories are certainly high on emotional and sensual tension but low on explicit sexual detail - that's left to the imagination.

So, from one fantasy to another here is Harlequin Romance's sassier side:

The lighter, flirtier end of Harlequin Romance offers a contemporary twist on classic themes. Here, 21st Century alpha males take centre stage, but they have to share it with their spirited, feisty heroines who always give as good as they get! You'll find editorial here which pushes the boundaries of usual series themes (check out Fiona Harper's Swept Off Her Stilettos, which is in the first person or Nikki Logan's Mr Right at the Wrong Time where the hero is married!). Every story has a high level of sensual tension, but with a low level of explicit detail, against a backdrop of fabulous, mostly urban, cosmopolitan settings. This is quintessential romance for the modern day!

As some of you may know, two of the flirtier, less traditional Harlequin Romance stories per month are published as part of the RIVA series in the UK, along with the two sassier books from the Presents Extra series.

For this PRESENTS EXTRA/RIVA editorial we are looking for edgy, sharply contemporary stories, which, like Harlequin Romance's sassier side, offer a fresh take on core romantic themes. These are glamorous, high octane books with irresistibly alpha heroes, who will meet their match in fabulous, feisty heroines. They are much higher in explicit sensual detail than the Harlequin Romance/RIVA stories, however the contemporary voice, mostly urban and glamorous settings and boundary-pushing editorial are the same.

No matter whether your story is flirty and edgy or warm and cosy, we're looking for stories that have happy endings and a sense of joyful escapism! Since these books are no more than 50,000 words, the main focus is the romance itself - whether your story is about a gorgeous rancher and a single mum, or a single girl in the city, it should be driven by the characters themselves and their growing feelings for each other.

Hope this helps you understand our series a bit more!

So, what else have we got lined up for you in this spotlight week?


We're actively looking for new voices to join our group of talented authors, so we're currently holding a 'fast track' submission event. Anyone who sends us their first chapter and synopsis before 23RD APRIL will hear back from us less than ONE MONTH after the closing date, before the 18TH MAY.

The email address to send your submission to is

Please attach your first chapter and short synopsis to the email as well as a short query letter, letting us know how much of the manuscript is complete. Please note, we'll be looking at only one submission per person.


Look out for blogs from some of our authors talking about their experiences of writing for our series.


Find out what we get up to all day!


We're also going to share a sneak preview from author Patricia Thayer about our exciting 8 book series that's launching in July, "The Larkville Legacy".

It's goodbye from the Harlequin Romance team for now, but we hope you enjoy this special spotlight week! Please feel free to leave your comments and questions and we'll check back - and we can't wait to read your fast track entries!

"Bryony, Meg, Anna and Charlotte xx "

Sunday, January 11, 2015

0 Singapore Productivity Or Excellence

Singapore Productivity Or Excellence
With the advent of the upcoming Budget in Singapore, it appears that many people in the business community are expecting additional benefits from the Government. While I will always welcome government support, I also know that this is not the defining factor. Looking at the way people have interpreted and debated the new Population White Paper, it appears that everything is now externalized. All pros and cons are evaluated based on the lines of tangible hard facts of economics versus the soft intangibles of social benefit. My take is a little different, and more psychology driven than politics driven. My premise is not to build only an external solution. Scientifically we know that external motivation does little to sustain a person. Why do we strive so hard to build a family or career? Because it develops satisfaction. But satisfaction often comes from dealing with something challenging and difficult! That is the nature of human behavior. The issue here is most people talk about developing the hardware, the infrastructure. The premise is that when this improves, people will be more satisfied with life. This is a great equation, and unfortunately too simplistic in my opinion. The best looking building may also hide cracks in the foundation, just as the most good looking person may hide scars from the past. The reason for my skepticism is even if we build great infrastructure, without building the appropriate attitudes, we will end back in this same scenario ten years later because we did not address the beliefs and attitudes that created this scenario in the first place. I am growing, and I hope I am wrong, to see a society in Singapore become inward looking, complaining and blameful, complacent, dependent on government support in spite of not being a welfare state, and driven by the illusion that security, absolute security, is possible through external intervention. While I acknowledge that this is a generalization, I prefer to work on the assumption of the worst case scenario, so anything else gained is a bonus. When you ask someone to fix a problem, there must be awareness and acceptance that there is a problem. However, when telling someone that the issue is with them, it is very hard to see. I've told people that when I suggest a change in their behavior, that they need to look at it not from me as a person pointing fingers and complaining, but rather as a person who is offering a unique perspective, thereby potentially offering a change that is an improvement. Of course, as a coach, I expect to encounter resistance. All the more I have to be patient and learn to understand why the response to the situation was lackluster. Perhaps it was a misinterpretation of my intent. Perhaps it was something that I did not bring across well. Whatever the case, it all calls for realizing that everyone has difficulties, and every person's opinions are slightly different because we are not uniform. We are human. In Singapore, we seem to strive to be a very materialistic society. The word "productivity" itself says it all: achieve more. Instead, I challenge people to move away from the concept of productivity to the concept known as "excellence". Just as it is human to be vulnerable, it is the human spirit that goads us on to excel. Excellence is not a science. It literally is an art form. In my opinion, to strive for excellence begets productivity, but from the inside-out rather than from the outside-in. It means we have to look at ourselves as the integral part of the bigger picture, and to say: how does what I do affect the greater scheme of things? Take for instance the issue of foreign talent. I am aware deeply that there are fears here. But from an employer standpoint, if you give me proper market forces to dictate my choices, I will note two things. First, Singaporeans appear relatively less hungry than some others to fight for their rice bowl. It means I'm no longer sure how dedicated they will be on the job. Based purely on the law of numbers, give me a bigger talent pool and I will eventually find someone who is dedicated and skilled and lower in cost based on an employer's criteria. If, in worst case scenario thinking, all Singaporeans fall out of the category, it must mean that something they are doing is making them unhireable. I believe I am a logical and rational employer. If something costs 100 but is worth 1, I'd be the biggest fool buying it. The question is whether Singaporeans can be that employee that makes a 5,000 investment in salary worth 500,000. So the issue in my opinion, is an attitude. Why would anyone help someone win 500,000 on just 5,000? I believe, someone who is playing in a Blue Ocean, not a Red one. A Blue Ocean represents win-win, positive and sustained growth. In a proper ecosystem, a Blue Ocean employer thinks of how to help his employer maximize return. A Red Ocean employee simply asks "why should I lose out?" without seeing that the gains are mutual: the employee becomes more skillful from experience, hence more valuable and marketable, and the employer gains tangible returns from offering this autonomy, challenge and monetary stability. The employee learns to communicate this value and builds a long term relationship with this employer, possibly eventually going into joint partnerships in the future. Who exhibits better personal excellence? If market forces come in, Singapore workers will be forced to improve, hence sharpening our edge against a tidal wave of changes expected. Perhaps this is harsh, and from a political standpoint, too extreme. Yet, any Singaporean reading this should know that we can be overcome by economic forces anytime as a small country. Should we not depend more on building personal excellence first? This is the ultimate security: knowing you have faith in your own abilities to build a future you want, anytime, anywhere, even with limited resources. This leads me to my second point. Personal excellence is intangible. I have been teaching this for close to two decades and had been a fundamental turning point for myself in my early teens. Without this attitude, I believe I would have just been the average guy. Yet, we see people clamoring for programs and schemes that are all about money making and wealth building. I'm not against that, and I know the allure of such programs. Yet money is what you end up with based on who you are, what you can do, and whether or not you act on it. I have not seen people who apply their talents, go hungry! This is fundamental, but I think it has not been driven home. Sadly, I am seeing more people who are hanging on to the government as the only support. A crutch. Instead, a heavy dose of learning and self improvement should be ingested. For all the available grant schemes in Singapore, perhaps the training grants should be lauded the most, yet people may not tap on them let alone know about them. Personal excellence is something we have heard of and not known for. We watch and are awe-inspired by the likes of Rocky and Warrior, The Pursuit of Happyness and Remember the Titans. These stories talk about the impeccable quality of the human spirit. Perhaps we are still young, and as a country still coming out of teenagehood, we still depend on our parents while demanding autonomy. Perhaps in time we can kill the mentality of entitlement and replace it with an attitude of excellence so that we will be known less as an efficient country but a country with a heart, standing to defy the odds and come out stronger. This is where we began in our roots of independence. That is our legacy. It is a calling we have been invited to answer in this period of trial and uncertainty. And it is not the country that has to take action but the individual. Will you answer that call to be excellent?

Thursday, January 8, 2015

1 Where To Meet Singles To Date

Where To Meet Singles To Date
The most obvious place to look for a decent date is the internet. You can find a singles site for just about any person. There are local sites, national sites, as well as sites based on religion and culture.

There are sites that do the matching for you based on personality profiles and still others where you can search and browse and then make contact. You can also go to chat rooms to find people who are interested in the same things as you. At one time there may have been a bit of a stigma with online dating, but these days it's as common as it can be. All you need to get started is a few digital pictures of yourself and an Internet connection. Check out this free dating site

Speed dating is another popular way to meet people. Most major cities have companies that provide this service. The idea is that you get to have dates that last anywhere from 2-5 minutes so that you can see if you have an initial attraction with someone. You'll go in a circle so that you meet several people in a short time. Then if both of you are interested, you can exchange numbers or arrange a date at a different time and location. This is a great way to meet a lot of potential dates at one time.

Another option for dating is a dinner club. Again, this is an option that you can find in larger cities. When you join the club you'll be scheduled for an appointment that has lots of different people joined together for a meal. You'll be able to chat with many different people in a low-pressure environment. If you make a connection - great. If not, at least you had an enjoyable meal.

If you're not comfortable with dating services, you may want to see if your friends or family can set you up with someone.


Wednesday, January 7, 2015

0 Educational Psychology Woman Word Look For The Woman Inside

Educational Psychology Woman Word Look For The Woman Inside
Editor's Note: Welcome to day four and the final unveiling of a week of debuting some new features on So about what I said...! Today, friends, like I did with Mind of a Man, it's now the women's turn to have their say in A WOMAN'S WORD. First up is my lovely and insightful blog friend, Amanda. We're so alike in so many ways, so I couldn't resist getting her thoughts on some of the disability issues some people give me crazy looks for even expressing. See what she had to say!

If you'd like to submit your own topic for this feature (women only, remember; men, you've got your own column, so don't get to feeling too inferior), feel free to email me at mellow1422 [at] aol [dot] com.


I enjoy giving other people my energy. With dealing with depression issues, it is a must that I go places on a daily basis. I like meeting people on the buses, in stores and going out to eat. There are many people who don't really understand that a person with a physical disability can be happy in that role. There are a few instances where the disability wears off and the non-disabled woman can be seen. One is when I exercise on the floor. I remember as a child watching a group of swimmers dancng in a line. I layed on the floor and pretended to be one of the women. I still do that to this day. The second is through reading. When we read, authors give us a clear vision into the imaginary world. We are able to be non-disabled wives and mothers who juggle everything. The last is through writing. What better way to open up to our world than to write?

How do you view our society's outlook on disabilities in the media? How can we change the view to gain full acceptance?

My view on our society is that this world was not made for people with physical disability to begin with. There have been jokes about our "ancestors" being locked in closets. One of my favorite movies is "The Secret Garden." In the movie, there is a boy whose father keeps him hidden in a bedroom. The mother has passed on. There is no life whatsoever in that house. Our society has made disabilities out to be a dark, dreary room. Who deserves that life? I remember reading Julie Andrews' book "Mandy" years ago. Instead of Mandy living in a plain cottage, varieties of flowers were planted outside. That's the goal of what each one of us hopes to convey to our society. Personally, I would rather have a lively feeling internally and externally.

Changing other people's viewpoints happens through advocacy. Those of us who are unable to speak advocate through writing articles and letters to educate. I can not begin to tell you how uncomfortable it is to be around someone who gives off vibes of having a disliking a person with a disability. Some people do not care to understand about our lives. There are many people who do feel that we should not be around at public events. What alleviates that rejection feeling is having small children coming up to us with wheelchair fascinations. The child's eyes shine as they look at our chairs in awe amazement. A child's curiosity makes up for every ounce of heartache caused by society.

How do you view yourself? Do you see your disability in the mirror?

That depends each day. The battle of self-acceptance is a daily fight. When I look in the mirror, I see my face. My chair is not visible, only the handles. I see the woman who I lost to suicide when I was a child. I see that woman's love of the law staring back at me. I see this lovely lady deep inside of me telling me to keep her wholesome memory alive and share my happiness with everyone I meet. I see the only picture I remember of this woman as her arms lifting me up as a child. This woman gave me so many dreams.

I do see the disability in the mirror at times and away from the mirror. There are many times when I would love to move to a log cabin and be a female hermit. The drawbacks to that life would be the same as a suicide. I have some negative self-images. I have battled with weight issues. I used to cope with stress through eating heavily. These days I eat two meals a day pretty much. I drink a shake at noon, eat a health chocolate bar mid-afternoon, and then eat something light around seven or eight. You could say I am trying to be like a non-disabled woman through physical appearances.

What do you believe men do not understand about a woman who is physically disabled? How can we change a man's perception of us?

I don't think men understand that women with physical disability need more attention than most women. When a non-disabled man decides to get into a relationship with us, he needs to realize that there will be sacrifices. He needs to have patience. There will be things we may not be physically able to do. Dates of skiing, skating, and learning how to do the waltz are not on the list of enjoyable activities. If we mention something in the past and he remembers through that information through his actions, then that Is the perfect man.

As much as we want a man to change and date us that will not realistically happen. I personally do not want to have a boyfriend whose perception I need to change on my disability. A man either accepts the disability and me, or I don't need him in my life. I would wonder about problems that may arise if I dated someone whose perception I needed to change at first.. I feel more comfortable around men who have had a friend or family member who has been disabled, or better yet, that guy is disabled. I am finding out that men from other countries are very accepting of women in wheelchairs.

[Photos via Audrey Hepburn Complex]

Sunday, January 4, 2015

1 Using Craigslist To Meet People

Using Craigslist To Meet People
I've used online dating services almost since their inception when I've been single and wanted to meet someone. I started as a geeky girl in demand when there were few of us online, and from that a sort of elitist mentally spawned: online dating sites were fine, but I drew the line at the classifieds and chat rooms. For many years I've clung to this unspoken yet firmly entrenched rule of mine, and many of my friends have as well. Clients that have used Craigslist to meet people were few and far between, so I wasn't asked for advice on the subject often. Fast forward to a few days ago, when I realized I've been single for some time and would like to start dating again. How should I meet people that I could potentially date? Sure, I can review my own list of places to meet people (and did), but I wanted to try something different. Something I'd never done before, something that might help me encounter folks I wouldn't meet otherwise, something totally out of character. A girlfriend of mine suggested Craigslist. My first reaction was to laugh, and then... well why not? I wrote up a short blurb explaining where I was at and what I was looking for, as well as what I have to offer someone else. A quick proofread and a few mouse clicks later, my Craigslist ad was live. Would anyone reply? Would people make fun of me? How many inappropriate photos would I get? Would safe dating be an issue? It didn't take long for the first people to answer, and I was surprised with their candor and intelligence. Yes, I did receive a few undesirable responses (which were immediately put in my spam folder so I never heard from them again), and a dating scam offer or two. Many were considerably older than what I'd expressly stated a preference for, and some were honest with their want for casual dating only. One gent sent a nasty note when I didn't reply in a timely manner, and one email was from a good friend (we shared a few laughs over that one). All in all though, the experience was better than I'd hoped for. Its success is still pending, but if meeting new people was my only goal, Craigslist provided me with more positive interactions and opportunities than any online dating site has in years. If things don't work out with any of the Craigslist folks, maybe I'll try something even more out of my comfort zone in a few weeks' time. But what about you? Have you used Craigslist to meet people? Why or why not? Are you concerned about safety, who will contact you, privacy or how it will come across to your friends/family?

Saturday, January 3, 2015

0 Musing Omg Vs Meh

Musing Omg Vs Meh
'Not Dressed As Lamb'. That's what I hope I am at the ripe-old age of 39. I'm also trying not to be predictable mutton either. Now don't get me wrong, I'm a great believer in women of all ages being able to wear whatever they like (as long as it doesn't harm or deeply offend anyone). And I also believe in making the most of what you've got, whether you're a nubile 18 year old or a 40-something cougar. And while I love - no, adore - reading gossip/celebrity magazines, where I drool over the "Best Dressed" pages and, likewise, recoil in enjoyable horror at the "What Were They Thinking" ones overleaf, I can't help but feel differently when out on the street and seeing women in similar attire. In the past I've found myself judging other women on what they're wearing, but what right do I have to do this? They may well have taken as much time over their appearance as I did that morning, and left the house feeling a million dollars. It's this feeling that I think every woman should work towards achieving as a direct result of her chosen outfit every day, whether or not the trained eye of a stylist thinks the result looks like Audrey Hepburn reincarnate or a downright mess. If she loves what she's wearing, feels great, then who cares? The fact that her outfit makes her happy is the main thing. Case in point: Su Pollard. I think she looks bloody amazing. I know, you're thinking, OH - MY - GOD. I used to think that too, until recently. The eccentric English actress has always dressed as madly as this, and if you've never seen or heard of her before then all you need to know is Su Pollard was the Lady Gaga of her day. Why on earth would I publish a photo on a fashion blog of someone looking like the teen section of Chelsea Girl had thrown up on her? Well, I also thought she was a walking fashion disaster. During the 80s, whilst I was wearing my white stilettos, electric blue jumpsuit and matching mascara, I wondered how she could even leave the house in the most uncoordinated, migraine-inducing ensembles I'd ever seen. But now that I'm older (and a little bit more tolerant) I can see that bloody hell - she's always looked "happy". And didn't seem to care what anyone else thought. Think how much time and effort went into that outfit. That's not an outfit that just happened to be whatever was to hand that morning - she went all out, guns blazing, I'm-gonna-rock-the-striped-socks-fur-and-feathers-look today. The contents of her wardrobe must be to fashion what Willy Wonka was to chocolate: tacky, over the top and absolutely delicious (in a bonkers way). You've got to hand it to the woman - she accessorises beautifully with all the confidence in the world. And it's not a one-off, this is her whole "raison d'^etre". Now you're probably still thinking, I don't care, it's still O-M-G. Well, at least it's not 'meh'. Plain old, boring, lifeless... "meh". You know, the outfits where there's no thought, no care, no effort, just total apathy. With unattended-to hair and make-up to match. They're the women I see on the street that I want to drag into the nearest department store and allow to run amok, be free, have a fling with an orange and cerise striped kaftan, tickle the fancy of those cerulean platform wedges, and never darken the door of apathy ever again. Personally, I prefer O-M-G to "meh". Bloggers write blogs because they have something to say. Something they're passionate about. Something they love. So next time you read a nasty, spiteful comment on someone's fashion blog (or, god forbid, think about posting one), think about Su. Deliriously happy in her outrageous colours and fluffy accessories. Is there a single ounce of happiness coming through those nasty words you see on your screen?


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